Fade Into You
The first time I ever heard Mazzy Star was also the same night that I had my first kiss, and the beginning of my first real relationship. That night, if I remember correctly, must have been May 21, 1994. At the Black and White Ball I kissed Grecia Moreno, or maybe more correctly she kissed me, and it was the happiest I have ever been. An hour earlier she had said she would be—my girlfriend. I *was* so happy—it isn’t a fond imagination, or a faulty nostalgia. My brother Mike remarked that if I was that happy over a kiss, he couldn’t imagine what I’d be like over sex. Later on, I’d have an angry, bitter answer for his question—but that’s a story told somewhere else.
Mike picked me up from the Ball in his truck; I wasn’t old enough to drive yet. He had picked up a new CD—Mazzy’s So That Tonight We Might See. We hung out in the garage, where the old computer was, and listened to it—Hope Sandoval’s singing was the only thing that could have brought my mood down that night. It was so beautiful, but I couldn’t listen to very much of it right then, because it was so mournful. It was so sad and that was the exact opposite of what I was.
Do you believe in coincidences? Or synchronicity? Today I was depositing my check at the new Washington Mutual office. I was leaving the bank and walking towards my car on the far end of the parking lot—next to my vehicle Grecia and someone, I barely noticed him, had parked next to me and were walking towards the entrance. It took me a moment to shake my— shock, stupor, surprise is what I’m looking for—and I said, “Hello, Grace.” She looked at me and said, “Hi Tim.” Then she and the guy kept walking toward the bank, and I kept walking towards my car. I haven’t seen Grace in over a year and…
On the drive home the radio was playing Mazzy Star. I didn’t make an immediate connection, I just turned the radio up because I like the band… It was almost home that these thoughts occurred to me. I don’t know if they go anywhere, I don’t know if they mean anything… I just thought I’d share them.
EOL